Like that glass, You broke me, you really did. You ruined me, honestly. I lost myself in you, & something I can't explain took over.. couldn't control it. It was drastic, too much for me to handle. I've grown with you, indeed. But I also lost that emotional part of me, that I'll never get back. My heart was on my sleeve for you, the whole time.. I loved you more than you would ever know. More than you will ever know. I love you, regardless.. flaws & all. It takes time to make something worth while & with false hope, I believed we did that .. we didn't. And that's my fault, I knew exactly what you were doing all along, but like a rider, or someone in love.. Right by your side, stood me, Me.. I did everything for you.. And you? You, put me through hell & back.. and I, like I always remind you .. I always came back. It was connection, but with no feeling, silly as it sounds. I don't know what happened to us exactly. Why we fell so hard & and hit rock bottom. Thing is ? I really don't know how the hell I trapped myself to the point I know I can't get out.. you made me feel like no other. Your bullshit moves, and I still loved you.
I feel like, you're fucking stupid. Like you just don't get it.. like you don't know why you did the things you did, why you move the way you move. You were my peace of mind, and when you left, my sanity held your hand.. and walked right beside you.. and was gone. My world came crashing down. Couldn't control myself. You stopped calling, and there was no more missed calls. I kept calling, no answer. Three times.. no answer. And you? Couldn't care less. It's impossible for me to give one, two, three fucks now.. about what you do.. or how you do it . Cause you hurt me soo much , that I hate you . Seriously . Feels bad of me, but I can't control it. The way you hurt me, slowly turned into impatience and disgust and anger. Looking back, I see broken promises, you not being the man you promised me to be. You not living up. Fuck it. Ask yourself.. who stayed real through this entire thing, me .. or you? Swear to God, if you sit here, read this and say to yourself.. I'll go crazy. I made you smile, you made me cry. I went under, drowned myself in you.. while you? didn't even get your goddamn feet wet. It irritates me to know, you can go on in life and not feel a damn thing, while the person you 'Loved.' is hurting, day by day. You got what you wanted , remember? You wanted me to feel the same pain, if not worse, as you did when you found out that I cheated on you. You wanted to rip my heart out and stomp on it, and then leave it there on the floor, lifeless.. you wanted to really fucking hurt me, after I apologized to you, for every little fucking thing I did. I apologized to you, in tears.. because I felt so bad, I hurt so bad, for hurting someone I love soo much. Our constant problems pushed you away.. and I'm afraid you're not mature enough, to come back.
But as my last words, to you.. for you or about you, I hope you fucking miss me. I hope the thought of you ever leaving, hurts you. Because I hurts me. And I hope when you do decide to come back, or say ' Hi. ' or whatever you have planned in the future as your comeback.. I hope you come back hard. Hit HARDER, & sweep me off my feet, make me fall in love all over again and do us real big. But again, that's my false hope. My fault. I just hope, that at the end of the day, you think about me. Never forget. Because for the most part, what we had.. was what we wanted, at the time. I'm done for now, so one for now.. and possibly forever.
..you'll live in my memories forever more I swear.
I Love you, but damn. You're killing me here.
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